The Golden Beads

Otto sleeps in a crate next to Rob’s side of the bed. He’s not a quiet sleeper. First of all, he snores like a drunk old man. Second, at various times during the night he moves around in his crate so roughly and wildly that I’m almost positive he is transforming into some kind of werewolf, and that when he finally bursts out of his crate, he’ll be wearing a cape he fashioned using only his doggie blankets.

It can be hard to sleep through.

I’m back to wearing the BiPap with nasal pillows at night, which has really put a damper on my goal to never have anything that far up my nose. I’m also using the chinstrap, which helps me keep my mouth closed while I’m sleeping. To quote my friend Kevin Swan, the chinstrap has definitely not brought the sexy back. It makes me look like an emaciated high school wrestler, but I must admit I’m sleeping better.

I can no longer lift my left arm over my head for a stretch, and it’s been ages since my right was able to move that way. So I wake up in the middle of the night with shoulder pain, and if it’s really bad, I have to wake Rob and ask him to raise my arms towards the head of the bed. Obviously, this is the highlight of his night, especially when he was comfortable and snoring just as loud as Otto. Read More>

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Letter to a Friend

Dear _____,

I was just thinking about who to write, when your name popped into my head. You’d think it would make more sense to write to people who are still alive. They’d probably appreciate it, and in fact, I do owe several people notes and emails. But you are the one I want to write to. Or if I’m saying this grammatically, you’re the one to whom I want to write. It’s just that that sounds so formal, and I don’t remember you being extremely formal.

Next week is the third anniversary of your death. We didn’t actually know each other that well, but I think about you all the time, because your death was so sudden and shocking, and because you left behind three young girls. I’m sharing this letter with people who don’t know your story, so I have to explain that you didn’t have ALS. But of course you know that. You were in the hospital having surgery to fix a blood clot – – is that the right way to say it? – – when you had a heart attack. You were 42.

How has it been three years? I remember coming to your house when I was pregnant and meeting your daughters. The youngest one was only 10 months old at the time. I remember sitting in your backyard and eating salads topped with freshly grilled chicken and laughing, because you were a really easy laugher, a trait I deeply admire. Read More>

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On and Off…and On Again

Rob and Scarlett and I watched the first Harry Potter movie this weekend. I didn’t realize that it was over 2 1/2 hours long, so it was by far the longest movie she’s ever seen. I also wasn’t sure if maybe she was too young for it, because I don’t think that your average five-year-old is out there watching Harry Potter. Three-headed drooling monster dogs and a scary snakelike wizard whose evil face is coming out of the back of someone else’s head…it’s quite a step up from The Octonauts and Frozen.

But it’s an example of something I occasionally find myself doing, which is introducing her to a book, a movie, or a concept a little early just so that I can make sure I get to share it with her. We read Charlottes Web when she was four, even though I thought that might be a little bit early to deal with the themes and storyline. I think her mind probably strayed a little during the book, but ultimately she declared that she loved it, and she was especially fascinated when I started crying at the end. She brought Charlotte’s Web home from the school library this week. She wants to read it again.

Likewise, she really loved Harry Potter and didn’t seem at all afraid, and I think it helped that we had listened to the audiobook first, so that she knew the story and what to expect. When the hideous troll lumbered into the girls bathroom, Scarlett burst out laughing. Read More>

|Categories: Life, Parenting, Progression, Relationships | Tags: , , , | Permalink