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Actions and Reactions

Rob’s new bike arrived this past weekend, and the weather did not comply with his desire to get out and test it. He said more than once, to me and to other people, “I can’t believe I’m just getting my bike and now the weather is so bad I can’t even ride it.”

I understood what he was saying, but it brought up a feeling that I get from time to time when people say things to me or in front of me that underscore my disability. The struggle I go through when this happens is to wonder whether I am being oversensitive or they are being at least slightly insensitive. I have more examples: the friend who told me she was so tired of sitting on a particular morning that she was going to stand for the rest of the day and make sure she walked around a lot. The friend who made dinner in my kitchen and went on and on and on about how fun it was to cook and particularly in my kitchen, with its counter space and great appliances.

There’s a big part of me that wants to laud these women for feeling so comfortable, and for maybe not seeing me as disabled when they said these things. However, I have to admit that in the moment, I was annoyed. You’ve been sitting all morning? I’ve been sitting for three years. You love love love cooking in my kitchen? I’ve never done that. Read More>