It’s been pretty well established on this blog that I spend most of my time sitting. That’s been true for about four years now, and as you may have read in any number of reputable publications, sitting all the time brings with it many health complications. Let me be more clear: I have a hemorrhoid. I apologize to those who feel this is too much information, but my little bottom feeder and I have been together for a while, and I named him yesterday so I thought I should introduce him. Not visually, don’t worry.

His name is Vance.

Web MD says that hemorrhoids are swollen veins, and that entire sentence makes me want to throw up. I think I just object to the words swollen and vein in such close proximity (both to me and to each other). Right about now, I’m guessing that those of you who were thinking I wonder when Sarah will write a new blog post are instead thinking Wow, I wish Sarah had kept this one to herself. But I simply couldn’t keep the wonder that is Vance from gracing the electronic pages that will live on after I’m gone. Read More>