Monthly Archives: October 2014

Downgrading a Deadly Disease

“HIV is certainly character building. It’s made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course I’d rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character.” —Randy Shilts, author of And the Band Played On and The Mayor of Castro Street

I recently finished reading Season of the Witch: Enchantment, Terror and Deliverance in the City of Love. David Talbot’s history of San Francisco is dark and stormy, frighteningly full of events that belie the free-loving-60s-hippie spirit the city is known for.

Among the stories recounted in the book is that of the HIV/AIDS epidemic that turned formerly fun, flamboyant neighborhoods into ghost towns. The gay population of San Francisco—of the country, really—was hit the hardest; healthy people struck down in their prime. That felt familiar.

I know that AIDS and ALS are very different. ALS is not contagious, and it’s not an epidemic. There are so few people who have it, in fact, that it’s considered an orphan disease, and commands very little attention from the NIH or the public. We all know this, just as we know that after this summer’s Ice Bucket Challenge, the game briefly changed for ALS.

But it takes a lot of money and a lot of attention to impact a fatal disease. Read More>

Phasing Out—A Guest Post by Carrey

Many thanks to Carrey Robinson Dewey for providing today’s guest post. Carrey first shared this on Facebook, and I thought it was so honest and enlightening. This is life with ALS: abilities—moments, really—are taken from us. Family life changes in ways we didn’t foresee and do not welcome.

It isn’t easy, and it requires us to shift our thinking every day so that we don’t drown in the reality of the disease. So that we can keep taking care of the people we love, even if we sometimes feel that we’re doing it from the sidelines.

PHASING OUT

Our morning routines have been nuts-o here at the Dewey household the past few years. In the morning, I wake up first, craft my edible art we call lunches, get the basic breakfast supplies out, cut fruit, empty the dishwasher, greet hubby when he comes downstairs, fix his collar, hand him breakfast, kiss him goodbye—finish getting lunches, backpacks, folders ready, find shoes, fix bedhead, stick a hair bow in, and a final “don’t forget to brush your teeth,” kiss them and put them on the bus routine!

That was all before ALS. Read More>

You’re Not You

On Saturday night I watched the just-released movie You’re Not You, starring Hilary Swank as a woman with ALS. Swank’s character, Kate, is 35 when the movie—and her disease—begins, and I wasn’t sure what to expect from a film that set out to tell a story that is so close to my own. Though I initially understood this to be a memoir, it is actually based on a novel written in 2007 by Michelle Wildgen. A very brief scouring of the Internet did not uncover Wildgen’s ALS connection or the source of her ability (or is it the screenwriters’ ability?) to so cleanly access many of the emotions and challenges that come with having this disease.

It was my story, at the same time that it wasn’t my story:

The pre-ALS life, full and fulfilling: check.

The initial symptoms, the confusion: check.

Fast forward to a husband helping with clothing: check.

The feelings of blame and guilt: check.

The comfort that comes from connecting with other ALS patients: check, check, check.

But… Read More>