Category Archives: Relationships

Stress Balls

I’m sick of thinking about ALS this week. I feel like I live in a land of meaningless press releases and articles promising breakthroughs that never come. It’s hard to stay positive, easy to get cynical. And from there it’s a slippery slope to downright depression. I don’t want to go to that place.

So let’s talk about Otto. He is 10 months old and still not neutered, because there has been some discrepancy between the information we received from our vet to chop him at six months and Rob’s research indicating that waiting longer would be better for the shape of Otto’s head or something like that. I mostly stay out of the conversation, because the presence of dog testicles doesn’t really affect my life on a daily basis.

That is, until we were trying to plan our latest trip to Lake Tahoe, and no one would take our horny, humping, aggressive maniac. Otto went to two different “auditions” at small home-based kennels that claimed to be happy to care for an unfixed puppy. After both attempts, he was gently invited to find somewhere else to stay. One woman said, “He’s a beautiful dog…and he knows it.” Read More>

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Extrovert Inaction

It’s pouring rain in San Francisco, and I decided to spend my day reading Sue Klebold’s memoir, A Mother’s Reckoning: Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy, about her son, one of the gunmen in 1999′s Columbine High School massacre. I read a review of the book this morning, and was immediately compelled to purchase it, for reasons I can’t easily explain. I’m actually in the middle of another book, a pretty good debut mystery called Out of the Blues, but I set that one aside to begin Reckoning. It felt like a critical read.

This whole week has been really busy for me, with visitors and meetings, and tomorrow is no different. But today my calendar was wide open. To some people that probably sounds nice, and even I can see the benefits of it. But here’s what happens to me when I spend too much time alone. I get withdrawn and tired, and I focus more on my ALS symptoms. Add to that that I’m reading this particularly devastating (but very good) book, and it doesn’t look like today is going to be the high point of my week.

I’m an extrovert. Read More>

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Go Women

In honor of International Women’s Day, Scarlett made a piece of art in class depicting her “She-ro.” Spoiler alert: It was me! I was extremely flattered, though a little confused because the text under her drawing explained that she is mainly impressed by me because I was brave enough to attend my own wedding.

I’m glad she’s proud of me, but I had to tell her that I wasn’t scared to get married, that it was something I wanted to do. Still, I did use the whole thing against Rob for a little while, enjoying the idea that his daughter thought it took a great deal of courage to marry him.

I don’t find myself feeling fearful very often. Sad, angry, frustrated: those are all emotions that I’ve described in detail on this blog. But I try very hard not to spend my time feeling scared, telling myself that it doesn’t help anything. That logic works for me more often than you’d think it would. I suppose this might be the result of my anti-anxiety pills, but I don’t actually take very many of those. Just enough to get me to my first glass of wine, and then it’s smooth sailing. That’s a joke! It’s not smooth sailing at all, just ask Rob. Don’t look him directly in the eyes, though, he’s terrifying and that’s why it was so gutsy of me to become his wife. Read More>

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